The biggest lesson for this year that has transformed me and has made my year successful and fruitful is what I want to share with you all today.
I always took pride in my ability to judge people. Once I met anyone or spoken to anyone, I would give the thesis on my observations and judgements. I loved doing that and took a lot of pride in doing that. I was right 99% of the times.
People used my skills and wanted me to help them analyze the right fitment may be to find the right business partner, colleague, life partner, etc. They consulted me before taking decisions. Wow, what a feeling! I was known for my judgements. But I never realized that there is another side to it. Until I met my Guru Sri Bhagwan, when I met him personally, he told me one Guru mantra that has entirely transformed my life forever. He asked me to perform one Sadhana for 49 days you won’t judge your husband at all. Accept him as he is! What a tough Sadhana. I built my identity around it. I was known for judging everyone. Unlearning that habit was a pain but the results are astonishing.
Later I started pondering on people whom I didn’t like to spend my time with when I analyzed the reason to why I refrain from these set of people? I realized that I am judged constantly to what I am eating, how I am smiling, how I am looking, how I am seating, and the list is unlimited. You don’t want to be with judges all the time. They give you different feeling and emotions altogether. Mom’s love is so unconditional, even before seeing her child, she takes care of them in her womb. For every mom, her child is the best in the world. That’s why we feel comfortable to return to her every time we fail or we succeed. Mother Teresa is the perfect example of a compassionate woman. You want to be with friends who accept you unconditionally. Have you ever wondered upon the fact why friendship is the best relationship? Because that is the relationship where you are accepted unconditionally. It is a relationship where you can be yourself, you are valued as a person. That’s why we are so bonded with pets. Pets haven’t mastered the art of judging us. We are happier & more attached to them, then our family members at all. Why do we need Guru in our life? Because they accept us with full compassion.
The biggest silent killer of so many relationships is a judgement we keep on passing about them, and the irony of life is we never realize it. If you are a daughter in law, then you are judged by in-laws every moment. As a wife, you are judged. You are judged how are you as a mother. At work, we are monitored for everything we are doing. So one tries to be the perfectionist in everything they are doing. But they forget to live for themselves. Despite doing everything for everyone no one is happy neither you are happy. All the relationship where judgements shall be there shall never flourish in life.
Then I realized that whenever I went home I wanted to visit my Nani, who stays in the village area, where hardly any luxury is there. I ensured that I meet her and spend most of my time with her. I was astonished that not only me but my other family members loved her equally. All had the same inclination to meet her and spend time with her. She wasn’t that educated, neither she has too much money, no fashion sense but why is everyone wanting to be with her? That drove me crazy. Upon wondering too why it is so? I realized that she loved everyone equally and unconditionally. She showered so much love upon us that we felt on the top of the world.
This new year even you can take a resolution to accept everyone as they are. As everyone is on the unique mission on earth. Everyone’s role is important in their mission. Now I have more friends, I see unconditional love around me. The more I give more I receive. It’s one of the basic human need to be loved unconditionally. If each one of us masters this, the world shall be a better place to live and happiness around. Be compassionate and you shall receive unconditional love from not only thousands of people but from even birds, animals and trees as well. Life is all about Relationships!!!
Judge Less and Encourage More as you just know their names and not their story!!!